On September 10, 2012 I made a commitment to myself to improve my quality of life.
I quit smoking.
I had been a smoker for seven years. I started when I was 16 with a few cigarettes here and there - I honestly didn't believe I was addicted. By the time I was 23 I was smoking a pack a day. I smoked on the morning car ride to work. I smoked after meals. I smoked when I drank. I smoked when I was stressed, and I smoked when I was relaxed. Although I didn't realize it then, most of my day revolved around smoke breaks.
A friend of mine had quit a couple months before me and I tried to quit with her - I made it less than 12 hours without a cigarette before caving and going back to my same old habit. It never stuck until one day she mentioned to me that she thought of smoking as "disgusting" after having quit. It changed everything for me - here was a girl who, two months prior, had chain smoked with me out on my front porch daily. It occurred to me that my viewpoint could also change, if I wanted it to.
That same day she told me she thought cigarettes were disgusting - I smoked my last one. I had about three left in the pack and ended up throwing them out in my garbage can at work. I made it about 20 minutes before wanting another. But I had made up my mind that I'd quit cold turkey - no e-cigarettes, no gum, no patch.
When you quit smoking, all you can think about is smoking. It consumes your mind, your body, and your emotions. The addiction seems like the only thing that matters. Someone told me that nicotine is one of the hardest drugs to kick - only second to heroin. I absolutely believe that's true.
I was also told that drinking alcohol while trying to quit makes it ten times harder - boy, they were right. I continued to drink on the weekends anyway (of course, I always have to learn lessons the hard way!) and ended up crying to my friends every night about how bad I wanted a cigarette. I was only making myself miserable - and everyone around me.
I was also told that drinking alcohol while trying to quit makes it ten times harder - boy, they were right. I continued to drink on the weekends anyway (of course, I always have to learn lessons the hard way!) and ended up crying to my friends every night about how bad I wanted a cigarette. I was only making myself miserable - and everyone around me.
I did everything I could think of to get through every work day without a cigarette. I chewed gum... TONS of gum. I drank bottles and bottles and bottles of water. I walked outside at lunchtime during the period where I would have been on a smoke break. And I bitched. A LOT. I bet my friends and family were probably secretly wishing I'd start smoking again, just so I'd stop being such a pain in the ass.
The one thing that I felt really helped me stay quit was researching online. Whenever I'd have a craving I'd google something, anything about cigarettes, smoking, or quitting smoking. I think it helped to know that I wasn't alone, and that other people had gotten through what I was going through successfully. I read lots of stories of people who relapsed. I read about different techniques people would use to kick cravings. I read statistics. I read self-help guides, and message boards/forums, and countless articles.
This website was invaluable to me while quitting smoking.
It dawned on me eventually that if I smoked even one cigarette that I'd revert to being a full-fledged smoker again. There is no such thing as "just one" - as with drug addicts or alcoholics, smokers are no different. It also occurred to me that if I didn't stay quit, that all of the suffering that I had been through so far would have all been for nothing.
So I told myself that everyday. I still tell myself that. One year later, and it never really gets easier. Sure, the cravings have decreased substantially - and most of the time anymore I don't feel the urge to smoke after meals, or when I drink, or on the car ride to work in the morning.
But sometimes I do.
It's a constant battle - but it's been more than worth it.
My quality of life has already improved. I don't get as winded climbing a set of stairs. I don't reek of cigarette smoke. I don't have to go outside in the cold to have a cigarette, while everyone else is warm inside. I've saved almost $1,500.00 in the past year by not buying cigarettes every day. My sense of smell has returned. My singing voice has even improved.
I hope someone reads my story and it helps them get over a craving, or make it one more day without a cigarette - or make the decision to quit altogether. A year is a huge accomplishment for me - I never thought I'd be able to call myself a non-smoker again. This is something I had to make the decision to do for myself. I take great comfort in knowing that while I may not be perfect, improving my life is POSSIBLE. It's possible for ANYONE once they make up their mind.
My quality of life has already improved. I don't get as winded climbing a set of stairs. I don't reek of cigarette smoke. I don't have to go outside in the cold to have a cigarette, while everyone else is warm inside. I've saved almost $1,500.00 in the past year by not buying cigarettes every day. My sense of smell has returned. My singing voice has even improved.
I hope someone reads my story and it helps them get over a craving, or make it one more day without a cigarette - or make the decision to quit altogether. A year is a huge accomplishment for me - I never thought I'd be able to call myself a non-smoker again. This is something I had to make the decision to do for myself. I take great comfort in knowing that while I may not be perfect, improving my life is POSSIBLE. It's possible for ANYONE once they make up their mind.
Please feel free to comment below if you have a story to share about quitting smoking, or if you need words of encouragement. We're in this together.
♥
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